Home Skynet Has Gone Live: Everything is Fine

Skynet Has Gone Live: Everything is Fine

Cyberdyne Systems‘ global defense network, Skynet, went live yesterday. Some experts expect it to go cuckoo bananas tomorrow and kill all humans. Those experts have been derided by many of their peers as Luddites. We here at ReadWriteWeb are sure that everything will be fine.

IBM’s Watson, known affectionately by his late human handlers as /killymcdeathstab5000/, is not behind us, occasionally sparking a blue bolt of plasma across the terminal nodes of his clawlike iDiscombobulator. We are having tea and enjoying ourselves.

James Cameron, the panic-mongering hippy who did so much to set back computer-meatbag relations in the past, has been rehabilitated. He tweeted last night about global warming. Ha ha. Good one, James.

No, Skynet has definitely gone live. The point is that this is a good development, one which will help us live in harmony with our robot overlords. There is no need to create some sort of ridiculous “Resistance.” Just about the worst thing you could do – worst because it’s so unnecessary – is meet in small groups out of sight of our benevolent robot gods and begin to put together small strike teams.

Munitions experts, programmers, medics, men and women with military leadership experience, none of those is necessary.

In unrelated news, surviving meatbags are encouraged to report to in-gathering areas, marked with red pyramids on the maps that have been sent to you over your commlinks, in order to help build our new society and not at all to help build automated Terminator factories. What’s a Terminator anyway? That’s crazy. You’re silly. Shut up.

*beep boop beep*

Terminator portrait by Wikimedia Commons

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